Just got back from a sojourn up north where the order of the day was family time and questionable cocktails in the swim up bar. It felt good to let loose, stretch out and kick back.
The only downside was the smallest one had developed an irritating cough literally as soon as we landed back home in our beloved Melbourne. We decided to load up on the panadol and see the night out.
The next day we woke drearily but without the usual chorus of kids cackling. We checked on kid two, she was tired, croaky and over it, kid one presented with the same symptoms. We did the dreaded test, lo and behold, positive results all round.
Forced time at home, not feeling the greatest, led me on a hard drive clean up. I found a lot of memory clogging junk but also found ideas that had been left unfinished for quite some time.
When the ‘band’ finished, I wrote and recorded anytime a wave of creativity hit. Most of the topics were focussed around loss and disorientation (how original), but sometimes I would shoot from the hip and let it ride. One of the files on the hard drive I stumbled across was a pro tools session titled ‘Living Here’. I knew exactly what this was and opened it immediately.
The performance is urgent, the mix is rough but the message is strong.
The unfinished idea was based around a Herald Scum article about how bad it was to live in Melbourne at the time due to the rise in African ‘gangs’.
The lyrics read something like this:
Borders built up by the ones who've walked before you
Stories retold with such negative intentions
Beliefs forced on you there's power in persuasion
Anger, anger and fear and fear
When did living here become so subjective?
Excessive attitudes breeding a hostile nature
I think I was trying to say is that racism is built into your psyche by your elders and the media, its fucked and you need to wake up.The next folder that caught my eye was titled ‘fire film’. Inside were six grainy black and white photos.
Remember when the whole East Coast of Australia was on fire and our former (thank fuck) PM was in Hawaii? During that period we had a couple of days of no wind in Victoria, it was dead still with nothing but an eerie smoke in the air. The peninsula was not alight but we were told to stay put, I felt an urge to head to the Heads, to see the sea and try to make sense of it all. I was drawn to the bay on the way to Portsea and was completely blown away by what I saw. I brought my trusty AF2 and shot a roll of what I thought was Kodak Portra colour.The roll was eventually processed in a batch with other adventures from the past few years, scanned and stored on a hard drive until my recent forced time off.
The one thing that flashed back at me as I looked at the photos from the bay was the memory of this blokes voice who broke my concentration when he quipped that ‘it's from the arsonists, not climate change’. I was in complete shock when the bloated fuck interrupted my silence with his opinion. What fucking planet was this guy living on? How did he believe that this had nothing to do with climate change?
Without hesitation I got the images printed and delivered. Once I received the A2 sized premium ultra matt posters, I hated them immediately. I hated what the arrogant, close minded fuck said to me and how it still rung in my ears. I hated what the paper said about the people of our town and how they tried to divide us.
Headphones in, ‘Living Here’ on repeat, lyrics scrawled over the black and white memory…..
Thank you Covid, thanks for making me take stock of what I have, help me close a chapter and move on creatively.
I actually feel free now that I have dealt with those unfinished works.
I don't want anything to do with the music or the images now and I want them out of my life so I can move on to the next shape/challenge.
Download the song below.
Hit the LIVING HERE link to see the images. if you want purchase an image, profits will go directly to Sikh Volunteers Australia, receipts will be supplied.
Peace.
Mack.